posted 07-24-2012 03:06 PM               

I am having a hard time deciding how I feel about this... It seems a lot of people from my generation (I am 19) are more interested in who Dr. Ride chose to love than what she has done for humanity. I have even seen a lot of people in the gay community already claim her as "theirs" so to speak.

It seems like almost half of the news stories being written have their focus in the wrong place.

As her sister was quoted as saying (in regards to her sexuality), "that wasn't her battle of choice. The battle of choice was science education for kids. And I just hope that all the different components of Sally's life go towards helping kids."

I just hope that sentiment is what is remembered by my generation as well.

Sally will be greatly missed and remembered always for her legacy at NASA and beyond. Rest in peace...

posted 07-24-2012 03:27 PM               

But two things have started to change my mind on the topic:

1. First and foremost, was Ride's sister, Bear, sharing her own thoughts on the topic (here with BuzzFeed):

   The pancreatic cancer community is going to be absolutely thrilled that there's now this advocate that they didn't know about. And, I hope the GLBT community feels the same.

   I hope it makes it easier for kids growing up gay that they know that another one of their heroes was like them.

2. And that got me thinking about how, when I was a kid, it did help to know there were astronauts who were in some way like me. For example, both Judy Resnik and I were Jewish.

   But in my case, I didn't need to overcome any significant social challenges, especially compared to what the GLBT community still experiences today. If sharing the news that Ride had a partner helps anyone find the strength and inspiration to follow in her footsteps, than perhaps the headlines are merited.

posted 07-24-2012 07:02 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by fredtrav:
When I first read partner, my first thought was this was the person who had co-authored her books and worked with her at Sally Ride Science.

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Bear Ride, though, said that her sister "never hid her relationship with Tam. They have been partners, business partners in Sally Ride Science, they've written books together... Sally's very close friends, of course, knew."

posted 07-24-2012 08:05 PM               

I had thought about posing this question myself when I found out though, but opted not to do so because I felt the time wasn't proper for it. Ultimately it will be up to Tam to likely say something about it if she chooses to. I am thankful that by and large the majority of the thoughts I've been seeing posted about Ride over the past 24 hours have honored her accomplishments rather than her orientation. Which as I see it is likely how Sally Ride chose to be remembered.

I would say though that Sally and Tam staying private about it all these years tells me that Sally might have been wondering if coming out might be considered "too much information" at the time. Sally it seems did keep her private life very private, yet still continued to be the spokesperson for women's education in math and science. She chose that as her cause to champion instead of the other one (which some are now using by claiming her as their "champion" after her passing) probably out of fear that some doors might close while others would open. That does take a lot of guts (borrowing a line she said to Allan and Roger after their Challenger testimony).

I admit, I struggled with the thoughts yesterday after one email exchange. But when I saw a retrospective on Sally on the CBS news where they replayed a post flight mission comment by Ronald Reagan who said "Sally, it is not that you were the best man for the job or the best woman for the job, but rather you were the best person for the job" that had me finally thinking that ultimately other stuff doesn't really matter. It is another topic for another time. It will likely come up again as some in the LGBT community might use it to score points against Reagan and his administration's handling of the AIDS crisis (there are still some very raw feelings on that issue). But that will play out in its own way at its own time. I just hope it doesn't diminish Ride's accomplishments in the process.

Taking into context all her accomplishments as part of the first class of shuttle astronauts to include women and being chosen out of six very capable women candidates (all potentially just as big prima donas in their field as the male astronauts could be in theirs), ultimately she was indeed the best choice and the right choice for that first mission. While history has not many people remembering who the other members of the STS-7 crew were, the average person in public will still remember the name "Sally Ride" if it is spoken and potentially say it in the same breath as Glenn and Armstrong (sometimes Gagarin, sometimes Tereshkova).

posted 07-24-2012 08:59 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Cozmosis22:
While it is unfortunate that today's mass media and social media will run with this irrelevant side-issue of her lifestyle choice, it is a sign of the times.

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I agree with a lot of what Robert said. Being gay or straight should not define who you are, so it would be wrong to define Sally simply as a lesbian. At the same time, it was part of who she was and how she lived her life and it would be wrong to ignore that.

posted 07-24-2012 09:02 PM               

• Former astronaut Sally Ride chose privacy over gay causes (USA Today)

  Sally Ride lived her life with integrity and by being true to herself, cultural analysts say, paving the unique way for how she wanted to let the public know about her sexuality.

• Why Sally Ride waited until her death to tell the world she was gay (NBC)

  In life, Sally Ride became famous as America's first woman in space — and in death, she's now added to her fame as the first acknowledged gay astronaut.

posted 07-24-2012 09:22 PM               

That said, he released a statement:

"Sally was a very private person who found herself a very public persona. It was a role in which she was never fully comfortable. I was privileged to be a part of her life and be in a position to support her as she became the first American woman to fly in space.

While she never enjoyed being a celebrity, she recognized that it gave her the opportunity to encourage children, particularly young girls, to reach their full potential.

Sally Ride, the astronaut and the person, allowed many young girls across the world to believe they could achieve anything if they studied and worked hard. I think she would be pleased with that legacy."

posted 07-25-2012 05:28 AM               

At Spacefest III, Jim Lovell said it twice:

"We are 7 billion astronauts together on this spaceship we call Earth, with limited supplies of clean air, fresh drinking water, food, fuel, and resources."

Listen to Ed Mitchell and you will hear that message repeated:

"We need to learn to live together peacefully, stop depleting our resources on wars, and live sustainably."

How many times over the past 50 years have pioneering astronauts reminded us that you don't see the borders, conflicts and differences between people from a distance in space?

The scale of this universe is too big for preoccupation with one individual's gender/sexuality/personal life. Anyone who understands human genetic commonality, shared biochemistry, and biological development knows how interlinked ALL humans really are. Examine other species and you will find a wide spectrum of completely natural behaviors e.g. parthenogenesis, pair bonding, sequential hermaphroditism etc. It's all natural.

posted 07-25-2012 05:38 AM               

"And?"

posted 07-25-2012 06:32 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by fredtrav:
Boy, I can really tell I am old. When I first read partner, my first thought was this was the person who had co-authored her books and worked with her at Sally Ride Science.

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I had a similar thought. When I read 'partner,' I thought Ride had been living with someone male for the past 27 years, and for whatever reason the two didn't get married.

posted 07-25-2012 07:11 AM            

1. When I read the obituary about Ride's partner with what I considered an obviously female name, I was a little taken aback that it was mentioned at all. I was not particularly surprised or fussed about her sexuality; and

2. I was also taken aback that Hawley had been sought out for special comment - her former husband from 25 years ago - but I was also a little puzzled by the tone of his obituary, which seemed overly factual and clinical, and lacking in warmth or emotion. It kind of rendered his obituary a little removed and unnecessary, at least to me.

posted 07-25-2012 07:44 AM               

As you did not elaborate on your reason for your assertion, I can only speculate you either are upset by the news as you find it offensive or you are upset over the big deal that is being made of it because you find it irrelevant and perhaps In bad taste.

In either case, I would have to point out that, as many people missed, my question was not about whether you or anyone else was okay, didn't care, upset or anything else to Dr Rides coming out. My question was to hear others perspective on what the media has decided to focus on and perhaps gain some insight on how such a media frenzy over this is disrespectful, hurtful or helpful.

And I would argue that this is somewhat relevant to our board and the reason is as follows. Anecdotally, I was shocked to hear a lot of people in my age group ask who Sally Ride is (as they never lived through the history of her momentous flight) and none of the kids I'm teaching have ever heard of here. None. This media coverage only focusing on this aspect of her life is going to make a whole generation see her differently from the get-go than previous generations.

My generation and the generation after me will know her as gay, an astronaut and perhaps a few other things. Whereas older people will know her more for her accomplishments in the 80s and beyond. Maybe I'm wrong in that assertion. It seems sad to me that its happening at such a large scale, but I wanted to get other opinions on the matter.

posted 07-25-2012 08:29 AM               

While the sexuality of anyone besides myself is of little interest to me, and while I respect the right of anyone to choose the extent to which they publicly acknowledge their sexuality, I do echo Robert's earlier point that this revelation could help. I've had to serve as a sort of den mother to a few students in the GLBT community, and I know how valuable a positive role model can be to someone who's trying to make sense of it all and feels alone. I can't think of many role models more positive than Dr. Ride, who made the most of the too-short life she was granted, and who did so much inside and outside NASA to touch a lot of lives.

posted 07-25-2012 09:35 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by uk spacefan:
Here's hoping that the media give Dr. Ride's partner Tam,and family and friends the privacy and respect they need at such a difficult time for them.

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posted 07-25-2012 12:16 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by David Bryant:
I don't care about Ms. Ride's sexuality: what business is that of anyone's? She was brave, intelligent and a wonderful example to girls and boys everywhere...

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posted 07-25-2012 12:22 PM               

The media will always run with the controversial aspect of a story when first they learn of it. People will then filter that news according to their own values and beliefs born out of personal, familial, peer, cultural, educational, and religious influences. Some people will be inspired, some offended, some won't care who she was, and many won't ever know because they are too busy dealing with war, hunger, disease, or poverty.

Hopefully the media coverage will challenge beliefs, enlighten, inspire and help to normalise what some perceive as a taboo. If NASA and the Astronaut Corps have no issues with gender/sexuality impacting upon flight crew performance and mission success then this issue fades into the background.

In the 1960s, divorce among astronauts was the taboo issue over concerns about public perception and implied psychological stability. Today, for some, it's GLBT. But over time none of that really figures in terms of legacy. When I reflect on Apollo 15 today, I think of some great images and geological and lunar science - I don't think of postal covers.

posted 07-25-2012 12:38 PM               

I have to admit that I didn't know about the "partner" comment until reading this thread today, but it didn't shock me or affect my admiration for her in any way. If this information allows her to be a greater inspiration for even more people, then it's a good thing. Until this type of information doesn't make the news, and is just viewed as a normal part of life we still have a problem. I think that day is a long way off though.

posted 07-25-2012 01:57 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Fezman92:
I'm 19 as well and honestly I didn't know about that and I don't care. It is a trivial item about her life.

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I fully agree.

posted 07-25-2012 02:22 PM               

If Ride can be hailed as the first U.S. woman in space, why is it inappropriate to also hail her as the first female member of the GLBT community to fly in space, too?

I don't recall the obituaries when Jim Irwin died, but I don't believe anyone would have suggested it inappropriate for obituaries to highlight his strong belief in Christianity. I am sure there were many readers then who knew little to nothing about Irwin's life after NASA and only remembered him as a moonwalker (if they remembered him at all). So, his own religious expeditions after his passing would have been newsworthy as well.

posted 07-25-2012 02:39 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by Robert Pearlman:
If Ride can be hailed as the first U.S. woman in space, why is it inappropriate to also hail her as the first female member of the GLBT community to fly in space, too?

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posted 07-25-2012 02:40 PM               

But as is now known, many marriages did not survive the intense workload (and also personal infidelities) of the astronauts. We can only guess what went on in those marriages. By the same token, Dr. Hawley's comments on his ex-wife's passing was to the point and respectful, as it should be (contrary to what a previous post here said); anything that went on in their marriage (or reasons for a divorce) was between them.

By acknowledging at her death an (obviously) loving relationship of twenty-some years, her personal life story becomes even more relevant, and perhaps more inspiring, than her space flights as gay people find more acceptance in society-and teach others who are not so understanding that heroes can also inspire quietly without regard to race, gender, or lifestyle.